Wednesday, December 12, 2007 //i'm the rockstar 11:05 PM
did you ever know ?
it has been so long since i last blogged , i don't know what i've been doing this days . wasting my time ? whatever ... today is Ben's birthday . happy birthday BENEDICT CHAN ! and of course my cousin's birthday which is on the 10th happy birthday MR.NG ! i don't know if i've been happy this few days . but hellium is real fun (: hahas and yang hong~ happy first birthday too!
i just can't find any courage within myself i dont know why . i can't even bring myself to even talk or smile to you . you just seemed so far . i cant reach you , i cant even double click your contact in msn , i cant even say hello . i don't know whats got into me but i just cant . that's just not the betty everyone knows right ? i am supposed to be strong , i am supposed to be daring and whatever so . i get so tensed up whenever i see you , i have never felt like this before . why ? this shouldn't have been the first time . but somehow it just feels different . as long as i know we are breathing the same air , standing on the same piece of land makes me feel so ... i don't know how to explain . but i guess you would never know and you would never see this . well , maybe you are indeed from another world , that's why i think you never felt that i lived or something , hahas . i wouldn't miss you , cause your picture is floating in my brain every second , as though you never did left my sight . but of course i am not so stupid to believe that one day miracle would happen , and i would wash off the invisible ink once poured on me . it is just too fairytale...
